learning to ask for help

In our fast paced lives in western culture, and also in other cultures specifically for men, it is looked down upon if you need help.

This idea is of course ridiculous. But we all still feel the pressure to not ask for help.

So today, let’s explore this idea of learning to ask for help

The first thing I want you to do is list all of the things you could really use some help with. I want you to make two columns though – one column of things that you actually cannot do yourself, and one column that you could if you had to but you would really like some assistance.

Once that list is done I want you to take a new page and list out all the reasons you feel like you can’t ask for help. This may take a while, and it’s ok if it’s a lot of feelings and not a lot of complete sentences.

Maybe you feel shame for asking? Maybe when you ask for help you are afraid you won’t get it? There are so many things that go through a person’s head when they have to ask for help!

So make that list.

Now on yet another sheet of paper I want you to look back at the reasons why you can’t ask for help and I want you to write responses to them.

So if one of your reasons was, “I feel like I should be strong enough to do this myself.”

Then a positive response might be, “You don’t have to be 100% strong 100% of the time. There is nothing wrong with needing a little help once in a while.”

So go through all of your reasons and open yourself to some compassion that we all need help from time to time and write positive responses to each one.

I hope once you are done you can see that it really is ok to ask for help.

Peace – Sara

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